Thoughts On THOR: RAGNAROK (Spoilers)

Well folks, the latest MCU installment and third Thor movie has hit big screens everywhere and, like the other Marvel movies, it was met with good reviews along with box office success. Here are a few thoughts:

The overall plot involves Thor (played once again by Chris Hemsworth) trying to stop the apocalyptic prophecy of Ragnarok which results in the end of Asgard as he knows it. Along the way he enlists the help of his brother, Loki (played by Tom Hiddleston), a Valkyrie (Tessa Thompson), and the Hulk (Mark Ruffalo). The group find themselves going up against an unexpected foe in the form of Hela (Cate Blanchett), who happens to be Thor’s long-lost older sister and the goddess of death. Let’s set the record here, she just wants to rule over Asgard and doesn’t want to unleash the devastation of Ragnarok either – this makes her Lady Loki in a nutshell.

This time around instead of a serious and noble champion, Thor is portrayed as a good-natured dude-bro who smiles then nods to the camera and knows what heroes must do no matter what. We know this, because the character repeats that sentiment out loud several times throughout the film. He also just happens to overlook all the sh!tty things Loki has done throughout the MCU films, especially in the previous Thor movie where Loki banished his and Thor’s father, Odin (Anthony Hopkins), to Midgard, or Earth, then took his place on the throne of Asgard. Loki’s evil deeds should’ve resulted in a grade A ass kickin’ by Thor but instead we’re treated to a villain who receives no consequence for his actions other than a jokey dig from the main character. The other problem I had with this movie is that certain situations carry no emotional weight for the audience or the characters themselves making it crystal clear that these Marvel movies are now lighthearted Disney romps. For example, Odin’s death plays out like this: “I’m dying kids – goodbye,” that’s basically it with the two brothers mourning the loss of their father for a total of a minute. Thor spends more screen time grieving over the loss of his hammer than he does his beloved parent.

Ruffalo as Banner sucks. His choice of acting style for this moment of Banner/Hulk’s life was poor and came off as forced awkwardness. The CG effects for the Hulk were surprisingly sub-par with the digital character looking like something that belongs more in a Pixar movie than the “reality” of a live action environment. The big fight scene between Thor and Hulk that the studio teased in the trailer quickly degenerated into an elaborate set up for a repeat of a joke from the first Avengers movie.

For all the press and hype that came about, Valkyrie is not portrayed as LGBT. It’s been made obvious in the film by her flirty eyes and glances that she’s ready to jump on Thor’s hammer at a drop of a hat (maybe in this case a helmet) and there is no sign of any other preference. So, it’s Disney pandering once again, trying to get as many people as they can to see their crap movie.

Jeff Goldblum phoned it in as The Grandmaster and his jokes don’t land. I love Goldblum, I’ve been a fan of him since his early work as thug #1 in Death Wish, The Big Chill, and Buckaroo Banzai but here his talent is wasted, and he was miscast.

Of course, it wouldn’t be a Disney/Marvel movie without some comedy. Unfortunately, Thor: Ragnarok relies on schoolyard humor. There’s a portal that the characters must escape through to get from Sakaar to Asgard called the Devil’s Anus and that leads to some of the characters cracking jokes like, “We must escape through the anus.” BWAHAHAHA! What are we, in the fifth grade?

I will say that the only positives about this movie were Cate Blanchett as Hela, looked great (comic book accurate) and acted terrific with the weak material she was given as well as it always being a pleasure to see Tom Hiddleston play Loki.

So, as you can tell, I was not a fan of this film since it borrowed elements from two epic stories (Ragnarok and Planet Hulk) then took a giant p!ss on them. MCU started out great and I was definitely on-board with every offering from this franchise until this big shift in their narrative which started to become more clear after Avengers: Age of Ultron. For me being a comic book fan and certainly no longer expecting ANY superhero movie to be 100% comic book accurate I still expect these films to be respectful of the medium from which they were birthed. This new batch of films pay little to no respect to the source material regardless of how many fan service Easter eggs Disney and Marvel have thrown in.

I’ve already shared my thoughts with friends and acquaintances voicing my disdain for what these movies have become, and their reaction was basically that I’m an a$$hole for not liking the most recent Marvel movies.

Therefore, by the standards of the MCU, I’ve fixed the almost universally agreed worst superhero movie of all time with a few seconds of photoshop work.

The simiarites between Batman And Robin and Thor: Ragnarok are surprising:
Vomit, seizure inducing neon colors – check

Pre-adolescent humor – check

Main character mugging for the camera – check

Sidekick(s) poorly portrayed and utterly useless – check

Set designs that pay homage to legendary comic artist – check

Miscast high-profile actor from the 1980’s – check

A snippet of music from a favorite children’s movie – check

Emotionally weightless death or near death of a parental figure – check

Surprise family member – check

Gorgeous female villain – check

Gorgeous female hero – check

Rockin’ soundtrack – check

Heck, even the posters are somewhat similar:

So moviegoers and True Believers, there’s another entry for the best superhero movie of all time for you. You’re Welcome

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